Seriously, I've been injured so many times that it's a miracle of the Lord that I'm not under a dirt ceiling right now. This will likely be a bit of a shorter section, since there's honestly not a lot for me to say about all this other than just what happened.
So the first notable injury I can remember having was when I got ran over as a child. Granted, saying that I got ran over is a tiny bit misleading, because it wasn't by a car. It was by a rusted out old go-kart frame being pulled on the back of my grandfather's lawnmower. So here's the story, he got this junked up old go-kart frame from a junkyard. And when I say frame, I mean JUST a frame. no seats, no motor, no seatbelts, no parts, barely even a floor. He had a plank of wood screwed on where the seats would be for me and my cousins (Isaiah and Cole) to sit and ride on. Thats exactly what we were doing one day, and I was having so much fuckin fun. I leaned over a little to feel the grass as we went, and my hand got caught under the tire. Since there were no seatbelts to keep me from going flying, I went flying directly under the thing. Hurt like a motherfucker, but I ended up not being seriously injured. Now you might say "hey, that was kinda anticlimactic" and don't you worry, I saved the tame one for the beginning.
Now how about the time I got shot? (How's that for a hook?)My cousins and I were outside, and being southern kids with no supervision, we had BB guns. Now, quick PSA, there is a big difference between BB guns and airsoft guns. Airsoft guns use plastic BBs specifically made to shoot at other people, whereas BB guns use metal BBs or pellets specifically made to hunt small animals, so getting shot with a BB gun would still hurt like fuck and could still land you some serious damage. Now, we were being fuckin stupid and shooting at each other with these BB guns, and Isaiah, the little bastard, shoots me right in the fuckin gut. In any other country this would have been worthy of a hospital visit but the American healthcare system is so shit that instead I opted to spend an hour in my bathroom trying to squeeze out the BB like a fucking pimple.
And now, the final noteworthy injury on this list: the time I almost sliced my finger off doing garden work. I needed a pole for some of my plants to hold onto while they grew, and I happen to have a grove of bamboo right outside my house, so I had a piece of dried up bamboo that I was hacking at with a knife to get it down to the right shape. Par for the course, I miss one of those hacks and instead it goes directly into my thumb! It cuts almost all the way down to the bone, and again, in any other country this would be a hospital visit, but not in the USA! I literally just stopped the bleeding and put a band-aid on it.